Since we were school children our grand parents and parents taught us to be in touch with our emotions. They never failed to ask "What did you learn in school today? Was your teacher wearing a pretty dress? Would you like to speak in front of lots of people and teach them things when you grow up?"
In their ignorant ways they thought us to observe everything and stimulate our fantasy about what we would like to do as grown people. They thought us to do our home work right after we got back from school "Because your brain is now in the learning gear" they used to say.
After the home work was done we were free to go out an play until dinner time. We were never told "Do this because I tell you to".
We were always approached by mother and grand mother in a nice way like "Could you help me do this?" and we were always willing to help. Father was the only forceful imposer and would never be much part of our lives. After so many years in the military he thought he should treat us as he treated his soldiers. He used to point his index finger at us and growl "I told you . . ."
Because of father's behavior, up to this day, I cannot stand anyone to point his finger at me.
It is amazing how little words or gestures can influence the rest of a child's life.
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